Monday, August 29, 2005


kelly clarkson - wet
Originally uploaded by RockStardom.
quick one today folks. so destiny's child is breaking up. garbage cancelled the rest of their tour. the VMA's were last night. and natalie portman has a mohawk. i'm late on this one i know. but i just kept thinking it would grow on me but it hasn't. she looks more like a dinosaur than anything.

and about the VMA's. didn't watch them, though i saw a tidbit from across the diner (adams morgan what) last night of kelly clarkson's drenched show ender. and then i came in my pants. i would have loved to have seen that in-person. and been thwacked by her sopping wet mane as she swung her head around like a ferris wheel on hyper drive.

but as much of an amazing performance that would have been for me, it does not in anyway, redeem the VMA's for me. the VMA's have become rather lackluster in the past few years, on top of the fact that i think a lot of the bands they honor are shit (read: this years show toppers green day).

i'm sorry. it's true. i do not like green day. i do not understand why people continue to buy their music. all their music sounds like the same 3 songs.

but back to kelly clarkson being wet. i'll stop there.

Thursday, August 25, 2005

The Boys of Summer

ok, so remember how much pussy jack osbourne got even though he was a fat ugly child just because he's jack osbourne? well, imagine the pussy to come (no pun intended) now that he woke up one day and became hot. sometime after his rehab stint, he decided to sign up for rock climbing or tai chai kee kung fu los kick-kick fighting or something and on top of 2 weeks worth of daily colonics (or something) he worked out rigorously. apparently he's given up on booze, drugs, and cigarettes. here he is folks.

man - what a kick in the face. now i just feel even more useless and fat.

moving on - let me briefly talk about one thing i am interested to see come out of Brangelina. yep - i'm talking about it. i vehemetly denied it was true for months; brad is a golden child to me, how could he do me wrong? i denied it when the pictures of them in english countryside were all over the news. i denied it until brad called me up and said, "listen friend, i'm banging the hottest female on earth, could you at least be happy for me?" so here i am, admitting what's right in front of all of our faces (sorry jennifer - go team aniston!). anyway, about the Brangelina thing; let's talk about brad's significant ex's:

juliette lewis
gwyneth paltrow
jennifer aniston

what do these women have in common, besides bedding brad pitt? well - they've all been featured in melissa etheridge videos, my friends. not sure what kind of swapping goes on between brad and melissa, but at the very least, his ladies do videos [snicker]. juliette's schizophrenic portrayl in "come to my window", gwyneth's hysterical and hreatbroken portrayal in "i want to come over" and jennifer's coy, girl-chatty-up gig in "i want to be in love". so clearly, next up in a melissa video is angelina.

my advice - tammy lynn, be present at all times. i love angelina just as much as the rest, if not more, but i would not trust that woman around my significant other. not only because i know my SO would jump angelina's bones without hesitation, but i don't think angelina would resist.

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Finding Out True Love is Blind

well folks, it's almost noon EST here in the suburbs of DC and i can't stand to be at work any longer. it's probably because the woman i am "teamed" up with is an outright moron who doesn't stop bitching. about anything. ever. could be her knee. could be someone asked her to help them. could be her daughter is freaked out about giving her second child formula and she's never done it before. her laughing makes my ears bleed. or maybe that's from me jabbing pencils down my ear canals. either way folks, i'm bleeding all over my $78 Banana Republic Stretch Poplin olive button-up.

but i digress.

i'm still contemplating the point of this blog. commentary on my life (as seen above), and about all things celebrity as seen here: 'Natasha Lyonne is dying, and her Father is suing'.

poor gal. hopefully she'll pull through and we'll have an excellent E! True Hollywood Story about her in the following months.

speaking of E! True Hollywood Story -- what a shame it is that we've never seen one on any visual artists. not even warhol. after perusing the list of all of the people with their very own E! documentaries, it appears you had to be rich and famous, which knocks out about 75% of visual artists ever.

well, here's hoping that many years down the road, up and coming DC artist Alicia K. Cosnahan has her very own E! True Hollywood Story. DC has a tendency to be passed off and merely described as a "political hotbed", but the amount of creativity coming from this city is impressive.

so, maybe a spiel about art every once in awhile? check out Alicia's site 'here'.

and no, i haven't bothered to really listen to that Louis XIV album.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Today Marks the First

i once pretended i would grow up to be some grand and famous author. my teachers even told me so back when i was a wee one in 7th grade. now many years down the road (and i mean many... but not too many), here i am with a J-O-B job, hating it, and daydreaming of fine-tuning my literary skills with a "public forum/social commentary" (edit, 'pop culture' commentary - i realized 'social' meant politics, too) outlet; after 4 years of LJing it i schwampeed this site idea from a source that i've already schwampeed enough from - and here i am. man do i love semi-colons.

i don't imagine this catching on quickly, or even at all, but i'll write my litte heart out, like i'm writing to all the pop whores who are just as obsessed as i am.

the first matter of order is my new staple in life:

i could go on about it, or you could click on the link.

click on the link.

and before i head on home to the District of Columbia - one thing i'm going to ponder on my 25 mile trek is - when did baby spice get hot?